So, where did I leave off? The gross bar, his hearing/speech issues… anyway, despite these obstacles, I learned that he is interested in making funny videos and works at a hedge fund. He likes his job but hates commuting home to New Jersey every day. Like me he has many siblings. Unlike me he is not close to any of them and “prefers it that way.” He didn’t like college and had gone to three different ones. He has not managed to remain friends with a single person from college and lives in his high school friend’s Aunt’s garage.

After our second beers were gone, he got up to get another drink. It had been an hour and a half and I’d had about enough of Kyle and The Subway Inn. He asked if I wanted another and I told him I was good. He asked what I would do if he got another drink. Surprised, and unsure of what he was getting at, I told him I’d hang out until he was done and ready to head home. He bought a drink, sat back down, and we continued our attempt at communication. I watched his beer, hoping he would drink fast so I could get the hell out of there; 15 excruciating minutes dragged by without a single sip. I slapped at a fly on my arm thinking, oh my god take a fucking drink! He told me about the history of his boring company and how he has respect for the rich family that started it. They “aren’t like some rich people, they work hard and treat their employees with respect.” I nodded.

He was finally halfway done and we were discussing the likelihood of girls being tomboys if they have a lot of brothers (don’t ask how that came up…). I told him I didn’t consider myself a tomboy even though I have brothers, perhaps because I was older. “Do you ever consider hooking up with your brother?” He asked me, not cracking a smile. I could tell he was joking, but couldn’t figure out what was funny about it or how to respond. “Ah, ew.” I said, and then, trying to work with the sarcasm, “oh, yeah all the time…” Awkward pause. I attempted a subject change, “The crowd here is so weird.” He looked at me angrily all of the sudden and said, in an abrasive tone, “I feel weird because you’re not drinking.” I’d already explained to Kyle that I had to work the next day and felt pretty defensive. “Why should I have to drink to make you feel comfortable?” He took another sip (thank God!) “Well, what would we be doing here if I didn’t have this drink? Just talking?” Was this guy serious? “Uh, yeah that’s what we are doing. What’s the difference if we’re holding a cup or not?” He rolled his eyes (Psycho!) and muttered, “It’s not just in your hand. The alcohol goes to your brain… I dunno it’s just weird.” I waited a minute for things to cool off and told him I had to get going. He said he’d probably stay and get another and have a smoke, so I might as well move on out. Thrilled, I told him to have a great weekend and good trip home on the PATH.

So this was probably the worst and weirdest one yet. I spent the evening trying to forget the repulsive surroundings and focus on whatever was going on between Kyle and me. Would self-preservation have been more successful had I done the opposite?  At the end he stood up and gave me another cheek kiss (almost ironic at that point). I walked out of the Subway Inn and let the heavy door slam behind me. I will never return.